Recently my husband and I have gone through some trials and tribulations like none we've ever experienced before. Some due to our own mistakes and some due to things brought about by others we have been close to who choose not to forgive although we have been called brother and sister by them for over 35 years.
The thing is, is that no one on this earth can discern the heart that has been turned over to God. They may try and even think they know the extent of the workings of another individual but in reality they do not know. None of us can tell what the relationship is between one human being and God except that of ourselves. We extend the right hand of fellowship to those who say they have been born again and accept them into our life as brother and sister and as long as things suit us with them, we treat them as such, and that is as a brother and sister. At least we do in church on Sunday. We may rarely think of them through the week however. How many of us really pray for our brothers and sisters and their families unless we are specificially asked to do so? In our churches we don't have prayer chains or prayer lines that have people on call at all times to call each other asking for prayer for someone in the church. The only way we hear for the need of prayer is if someone asks for prayer in church or if someone hears it by chance from just anyone on the street. For so many long years we could not even feel free to ask for prayer in church because we did not practice the invitation of prayer requests. It is slowly changing because so many people think it is so
restrictive on the congregation to feel as if they can't request prayer. After all aren't we God's children who believe in the power of prayer? For so many years it was an understood prayer that we ask God to remember all those who are in need from the heads of the river to the ends of the same. It was an easy way of getting out of praying for specific individuals although I don't think it was meant to be taken that way but rather a tradition that had been handed down. But getting back to offering the right hand of fellowship to men and women they should also have a scarlet letter given to them to tell them that the first time they do wrong no matter how small or how great, they MUST hang that scarlet letter around their neck and wear it till they die, to distinguish them from any other brother or sister and they should be told that they can't be forgiven anymore. They should also be told that they are contagious and are not to associate themselves with anyone who REALLY is a Christian. Wearing that letter will keep anyone from mistaking them for one. Sounds like the days of stoning people to death doesn't it. Sounds like Saul when he held the coats of those doing the stoning. Reminds me of all the brothers who grab brothers coats to hang them up for them as long as they know they are a brother, but Jesus says what you have done unto one of these little ones you have done unto Him. I don't think we really realize what is meant by that scripture, and how important it is to treat everyone the same.
Since this incident with us we have seen brothers completely turn their backs on us as if my husband had the plague and I will never forget what he told one brother, when he said, "You can't catch what I have, you already have it. It's in your flesh already." Another thing he told one brother is that you can shower right now and thirty minutes you can shower again and you will still get dirt off, because we are made from the ground and no matter how much washing you do, you will always have dirt to rub off." This inward man is not that way though. God will clean us up and although we may do things to grieve Him he will never forsake us nor leave us. As one old brother said to me once as a young Christian and I have quoted it many times, he said "Never do anything to grieve the spirit" and although I have tried to live by that the best that I can, I know I have grieved that precious Holy Spirit inside of me and it hurts to know that I have, but being part human we will be guilty at times and no one has to tell us for we will feel it in our souls. What do we do about it is the next question? If we hurt someone are we willing to go to that person and ask forgiveness as well as ask God. I know that I can, but I don't know about others, but how will I be received if I do is the next question.
Will the person hurt be willing to forgive me? What my husband and I have seen is little forgiveness from some and mountains of forgiveness from others. Evidently the person's nature has a lot to do with the forgiving, therefore he must be grieving his own spirit quite a bit also.
I have been writing for several years now and have met several people via of the internet and those whom I have met and profess Christ in their life has kept emailing me and corresponding with me because evidently our spirits connect. Some I know what church they belong to but others I do not. I don't ask. They don't ask me although most know I am Baptist by my writings. I did not start writing to get famous or rich but to try to reach people through God's love He shares with me. Never do I want to do something that is not pleasing to Him. My husband even worried that our church would not look favorably upon me writing books and really thought there would be someone who would say something to me about it. I was determined that if I wrote the truth about what God has done for me in my life and how where He leads me I will follow that good would come of it and it has. No one can take that away from me. There have been brothers who would not take one of my books and the reason why I do not know but I have my ideas why and one of them is that they are afraid of what another brother might say about it. Dictatorship keeps a lot of people in line and it is not God as the dictator either. It is pitiful when you get right down to it that others can lead people along like they do. So pitiful for anyone to be in that condition is all I can say. Referring to those who email us from all over the US, we have been so blessed. Yesterday a woman emailed me who always puts a saying or scripture at the end of her email and her name is Mary, also. She wrote "Never look down on anyone unless you are trying to help them up." Another one of her favorites is " Never judge anyone, except by the content of their character." This morning this email came and it said "If God brings you to the edge of a cliff, jump for He will either catch you before you fall or He will teach you how to fly." Another lady who I love very much and is so full of wisdom says "What the mind harbors, the body will manifest." Now that can be taken many ways. For if we think bad about ourselves, our bodies will show signs of distress. If we think inappropriate thoughts our bodies are apt to act out, if we think depressing thoughts we are apt to give up and go to bed, if we think upbeat, we will act upbeat. If we think spiritually we will act spiritual, but none of these mind harboring thoughts stay the same. We are constantly changing and reacting, and some of the things we do are not things we are proud of, but because we are ever changing, that too will pass and things will get better for us. That is how I feel right now. For so long our people have been held in bondage in many ways.
Fear for this and fear of that for what men might think of us rather than what God thinks of us. The Bible says that men lay burdens upon us that they could remove with their finger but they choose not to. To me that is so awful that a brother would not relieve another brother of any burden he could. Surely that is not of God to be that way. Jesus is so loving and forgiving and that is the way He wants us to be, but we all fall so short. It also says that some try to take away our liberty because of their own conscience. I think we all have been guilty of pushing our belief in something onto others when we have no right to do so.
The other night my husband and I were alone and Jesus came by our house. His spirit came down and blessed us beyond measure. I began rejoicing and my husband began singing My Savior's Precious Blood.
Where two or three are gathered in His name He will be in the midst. Just two of us were here, so we both must be His if He was with us and we were all in one accord. I then went to the bathroom to dry the tears
and realized as I looked in the mirror that I had pants on and my hair was gray, stringy and not as long as some sisters, but He had poured His blessings out all over me, and He knows I love Him, and He knows my husband loves Him and it does not matter any more to me what others want to do to us, for if He is with us that is all that matters. Those who are so perfect and feel they have a right to interfere with God's plan then they will answer for it. For as Jesus said when He was giving up His life for us all, "Father forgive them for they know not what they do" and that still rings clear today.
As Christians we are to strive to do the best we can and live as close to Christ-like as we can, but we will never get exactly where we want as long as we are still in this human body. One day though God will change us and will perfect us and will make us all the same. There will be no more groups better than other groups, there will be no more judgments upon us from men that were as human as we were once, and there will be no more big I's and little you's.
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